Well, I survived dive 2 with the help of Benedryl. Apparently it does indeed take the edge off. I also avoided my full caffeine intake this morning as I didn't need any extra help in the heart racing department. I tried visualizing before I went in and more prayers of course. The biggest help was bringing my ipod with a few new songs. I was going to load it with the exact number of minutes of music so I would be able to track time but I had about 40 min on there and that was fine. I let Doodle borrow it and it kept her occupied a good 15 minutes. She especially likes Justin Bieber's "Baby" and I do too. I do not care who knows it. He is adorable and that makes some people want to hurl but I love it.
Doodle kept me calm. It was amazing. As long as she laid still and played with my phone or a book I felt relaxed but when she started to sing or kick from boredom I started feeling the panic return though much milder than yesterday's experience. I also found that if I covered my eyes with my arm and couldn't see the ceiling of the chamber, I was okay. Sitting still helps the heat to not build up to bad.
Speaking of the word CHAMBER. What an awful word to use in this situation!! Its like calling it a Hyperbaric COFFIN or DUNGEON. Why didn't they name it the Hyperbaric fun tube or the HB Oh boy! Sheesh, who wants to lock themselves in a CHAMBER that doesn't suck blood? Me that's who.
I haven't decided if I will post a video daily or intermittently yet. But here is the really wonderful surprise. After the dive we had to go straight to her psychologist for ABA therapy (I will fill you in on that soon.) She did so great today the Dr asked me what we did differently because Doodle was so calm and cooperative. CALM and COOPERATIVE. I don't think anyone has ever used those two words together to describe my daughter during one of her many therapy sessions. That is mini miracle #1 But not the wonderful surprise. The surprise is . . .
We were sitting in the waiting line at the pharmacy drive thru in the silence no dvd, no radio, no talking and out of the blue she says to me "I love you"
You have to understand that she hasn't said that to me in 2 or 3 YEARS and never on her own. It was always echoed. Boy, what a reward for all I'm going through. If you have never had a kid who couldn't tell you they love you you probably won't understand how it felt, or maybe you can imagine it. I don't know but it's like hearing you've won the lottery. Really. That's all for today. Stay tuned and thanks for your many prayers.