Book Review : " Why God Matters "

Welcome to my humble blog  - Five Kids a Dog and a Blog.  If you are new here my writings are generally about my life with 5 kids, four of them being quadruplets, a daughter with autism and my Catholic faith.  Well its a big jumble O' stuff really.  I like to have fun and make fun of myself and other things but I will not be making fun of this book because I really liked it.

Today I am hosting my very first book review!  I love to read so when the offer came in my inbox I was intrigued.  When I saw the title it was a neat moment of hmm is this a coincidence?  I think not.  I had seen a blurb about this book somewhere recently and was thinking I would like to read it anyway.  Funny how that works out.  As I am newly trying to be extra frugal, getting to read a free copy was a nice little perk.

The book?  Oh I guess I should mention the title!  "Why God Matters - How to recognize him in daily life," is written by a father/daughter team- Deacon Steve Lubert and his daughter Karina Fabian.  I can only imagine that co-authoring a book on faith would have to bring a family closer even if it was hard work.  It is published by Tribute Books and is set up in fourteen chapters.  Each chapter has an essay on a particular faith issue followed by a short "Life Lesson."  The chapters are alternately penned by the deacon and his daughter.

I am immediately drawn to the familiar voice in the essays, that of a friend almost and I like the Life Lessons for their digestibility.  I know that is a strange choice of words for a book but it fits.

The writing style is quiet, simple and straight forward.  It does not lack depth but pulls you into the next chapter by not overwhelming you.  A chapter a night would be a good pace if you could hold yourself back, letting the lessons sink in and really finding how they apply to you.

The book quotes scripture as well as the Catechism of the Catholic Church, however this book appeals to a wide audience , its Christian at the core and as Christians we all believe in and love the same eternal Father, Son and Holy Spirit, no matter how we celebrate.

There are chapters on a variety of topics and the personal stories were my favorite as they added to the flavor of authenticity.  I just love this book because it doesn't make the reader feel stupid or bad about themselves!  Everyone has to walk their own faith walk.  No one can do it for you.  We all may hear the same words in the Bible, at mass or service but our life experiences are different as are the gifts bestowed on us by the Holy Spirit.  We truly are individuals created by God for a divine purpose.  I'ts up to us to spend our life working with God's grace to fulfill our task set before us.  I think this book will be an excellent tool for anyone who is struggling with that questions Why does God matter?

It is an encouraging book, warm and real and positive.  I do recommend "Why God Matters"

OK, now back to my less mature usual blog rantings - by the end of the weekend and maybe sooner I will post my final installment on my daughter's and my experiences in the Hyperbaric Oxygen chamber.  Also, does anyone out there care if I try to monetize my blog with ads?  I could use a little income and though this is a hobby I might as well try it see what happens.  If it's too annoying I will remove it.  Hey, have a great night and I will be back soon.

Hey! I'm back!

Well I guess I took a hiatus for the end of summer/back to school season.  I really miss writing here.  I don't want to be one of those bloggers who has nothing to say but continues to post anyway :) 

Update on Pauli :  We are about to finish our last three dives in the Hyperbaric Chamber and I will give my more definitive opinion on the whole experience at that time.  And answer some questions like - would I do it again?  Did it really help?  So if you're interested look for that at the end of next week.

I am really trying to get my act in gear right now.  I have big plans to get my house cleaned and organized before Christmas (quit yawning) and I need to get on a better schedule at the gym.

I have to say, as to the rest of my kids, SECOND GRADE IS AWESOME SO FAR!  I really feel that they have teachers more suited to their personalities.  Teachers with patience, kindness and an appreciation for their differences and strengths.  This year we split the quads up a bit more. 

This is always a big questions with multiples, DO you split them up or keep them together?  Thank goodness a law was passed a few years ago to give the parents the right to choose since they know best how their kids function.  Thankfully, differentiation is becoming a common mindset among educators and lest you scratch your brain at that reference I will explain:  In the past ALL multiples were treated like they came out of the same box. "We must split all multiples apart into separate class rooms no matter what their parents say or there will be a crack in the space-time continuum!"  Now, we decide because guess what?  I know that little Johnny and Jeffy get on each others nerves but little Sissy needs Johnny to help her make friends and shield her from some cruelness directed at her due to her smallness and shy personality, etc.   (by the way, not my kids real names!)

Anyway, I have Doodle in her same class which is perfect for her with awesome Ms. Andrews for the third year!  Her two sisters wanted to stay together and so they are while their brother wanted to try out things on his own and need to be in the FOCUS class anyway so that worked out well. 

Me and the little man are to be found most days at the gym, park and or grocery store.  I have joined the crazy coupon world order now and thanks to a couple of websites such as Southern Savers we are now saving quite a bit and I have stockpiled my pantry and freezer.  I had no clue how much I was really spending and now I have no excuse!  Look into it.  If I can do the system with my crazy life then anyone can.  One day I will conquer freezer cooking.

Update on book writing:  I have written, yes written two children's stories and am waiting patiently on my dear busy brother to illustrate them before I send them off to prospective agents.  If anyone knows anyone in the business who can offer advice please send them my way.  I have a couple other ideas I am working on that have to do with my Pauli and my family in general.  Have a great day!! 

Dive 9! Punctuation marks!?":

Isn't she beautiful?

OK, I skipped a post because I didn't want to bore you with the nothingness I had to report.  I ramble when there isn't anything exciting to say -

The dive was great today, as they have been all week.  I zone out, she zones out and we just chill (except that it gets quite hot and muggy in there.)

So I was thinking about punctuation marks today, you know I never really learned how to use all those nifty marks and even though I love to write and took advanced composition in college (my papers got A's but my grammar tests got F's!)  It just bores the h_ll out of me.  And yes, even though I am married to a former English teacher with a Doctorate.  I tend to sprinkle commas like a spice and they don't always go where they should.  I like to call myself the queen of run-on sentences.

Anyway, the kind of punctuation marks I am referring to are the marks in your life timeline.  The moments when something said, done or undone changed the course of your life forever, for the better or for the worse.  What are yours if you care to share or just think of them to yourself?  We all have them.  Everyone has a life story and some are more interesting or exciting than others but I bet most people could come up with a decent short story memoir to share.

Here are a few of mine:

When I was in college, about to graduate with a degree in Zoology (how many jobs do you know that require that degree?) And I had no clue what to do next. I remember the moment I decided to become a teacher.  On hind site I question the intelligence behind that choice but, no, it is the reason I have the husband, kids and life that I have today.

The moment I walked out on a cliff in Australia one night and heard God's voice in my heart, answering a youthful question I had very clearly.  That has always stayed with me because it was so immediately answered.

The moment I laid on the ultrasound table and was told I had 5 babies growing inside, that is an entire post in itself so I will leave that for later.

The moment I decided my husband had my heart.

And so on . . .

My point to all this is my fervent wish that the end results of these HBOT treatments will be a huge neon punctuation mark in my daughter's life story.  Or maybe not, but here's hoping.

Dive 7 - Bandwagons, Twilight and okra

Ha, right now you are thinking - WTH with that title?  Well I will get to it.  Is it wrong to say WTH?  I think that is less offending than WT_?  Although personally I snicker when people use that in conversation (the abbreviated form that is.)  Pop culture is a funny thing in general.

So people are either joiners, who make novels into bestsellers for instance, or non conformists who shun what's popular, right?  I can't really place myself in one category though if someone were judging me from the outside I would probably appear to be in the former category.  I mean look at what I've told you about myself so far, Harry Potter, Twilight, alternative therapies (yes ALTERNATIVE therapies are quickly becoming a bandwagon- funny oxymoron.)

Well, to start I don't have much to report about our visit to the CHAMBER today except that all I wanted to do was go to sleep (holding out on coffee before therapy!) And that is a good sign. But Pauli is getting bored and hot in the last 15 minutes which makes it hard to do so, sleep that is.  If anyone out there has any suggestions on keeping a seven year old with sensory issues entertained in a small place, let me know.  Please :)

One day I want to tell you all the amazing things Doodle is able to do and has learned to do on her own but today I wanted to mention something completely different because I am excited about this bandwagon, yes I have a point and general direction to this post!

Trends can be a good thing like people moving away from smoking, or a bad one like drug experimentation in the 60's and NO I wasn't around for that!  Some people like my cousin and my best friend are non conformist.  They aren't into Twilight (sheesh, I don't get that one at all,) and tend to think that people who do what everyone else does are yawnish.  I agree for the most part.  If everyone does the same thing how bland would the world be? 

However, sometimes the bandwagon is an great and awesome thing like the current trend toward eating healthier, local grown, organic foods.  How can that be a bad thing?  It's not.  So I was reading a post on something called CSA's last month -Community Supported Agriculture.  Where you buy a "share" in a local farm and in return you get a portion of each week's harvest.  I followed a link that was provided called localharvest.org and found a brand new CSA farm just down the road (new to CSA, the farm was very established.)  How neat!, I thought.  Maybe this will get my kids and myself to eat more fresh veggies.  They are OK about it but when I go to the store I stand there in front of the produce and have no idea what or how much to buy and tend to waste money and things rot in my produce drawer and give off a weird caustic smell before I realize I did it again.  Then it starts all over and its a vicious cycle. 

This way I know I will be getting a certain amount on a certain day each week and I just have to eat it up before the next Tuesday.  It's supposed to be enough for a family of four and with my kids being little, our seven will eat just this amount I bet.

Above is a picture of this weeks haul which costs $20.  It is supposed to be about 20% less than grocery chain prices.  Not sure, but supporting the local economy is a great thing to do in any case.  There is actually a little more than is pictured. So I have boarded this trend train for the better.  Now I have no idea how to cook Okra so if anyone has a clue please send it my way!  Talk to you tomorrow :)

Dive 6 - Week Two

Today was the easiest and quickest yet.  I think I will make it now.  So onto other topics.  I believe I conquered that hill :)

Its hard to say scientifically if any gains she is making are from the HB chamber or from her ABA therapy ( I think its both really.)  But I find myself watching her constantly to see if she is reacting differently, saying something new, express an emotion in a socially acceptable way. 

As I write the most wonderful thing is occurring.  She is playing a modified game of Jenga right along side her four siblings!!!  She is nearly always on the computer or messing with the TV remote, hijacking my phone or up in her room alone with toys or books.  She rarely engages with anyone else unless forced.  I am loving this!  I know it isn't scientific but she is changing somehow.  Let's pray it continues. 
BTW my awesome cousin Amber (almost 16) is here for two weeks and she is such a help.  She totally gets Doodle and treats her just like the rest of the kids.  I love it when people are comfortable around kids with differences.  Amber arrived into my small neighborhood yesterday afternoon and within 20 min the teenage boys across the street were snooping around sending there cute little brothers over to check her out.  My husband met them at the door and told them to tell their brothers to "Man up and come over to meet her themselves."  They did and I was impressed.  You have to understand A) there are NO teenage girls in my entire neighborhood but a lot of boys and B) Amber is a cutie.

Here are the pictures of Doodle and her siblings playing.  Thanks for the Jenga game Katie!

Dive #5

I couldn't believe it (yeah, really I could,) when today I woke up filled with the dread of going back to the chamber.  I have had a couple of decent dives now and am faced with the reality that its probably going to all be okay.  So I sucked it up and we went and it was fine except hotter than normal.  I kinda wish it was January?  That's saying something cause I really do not like winter, even in the south.

So all week I have been telling myself.  "If I live till Friday, I get to see Eclipse with my Sister in Law.  Yay!"  I made it and am just hours away from cinematic escape!  I loved the books and the movies are pretty good too.  So here comes my reward. 

I have one last thing to share which struck me as timely and interesting.  Don't you believe God is very subtle and succinct at times? Other times its more like a bullhorn but this is what I read on the dog-eared page that I turned to in a book I brought into the chamber during those first harrowing moments of the first dive.  Keep in mind I haven't looked at this book in at least 6 months but had popped it in my bag to keep me company.  It's called The Power of a Positive Mom.  By Karol Ladd.  Its a wonderful book, well written and nondenominational in the best way.
     "Norwegian Christian author O. Hallesby referred to prayer as the "breath of the soul".  He wrote:

The air which our body requires envelopes us on every hand.  The air of itself seeks to enter our bodies and, for this reason, exerts pressure upon us . . . The air which our souls need also envelopes all of us at all times and on all sides.  God is round about us in Christ on every hand, with His many-sided and all sufficient grace.  All we need to do is to open our heart.  Prayer is the breath of the soul, the organ by which we receive Christ into our parched and withered hearts . . .As air enters in quietly when we breathe, and does its normal work in our lungs, so Jesus enters quietly into our hearts and does His blessed work there."

Could there have been a more subtle bullhorn?  I am humbled that he took time out of his busy universe to see my tiny speck of sand body cowering in the stupid tube and answer my prayers for comfort that first morning by directing my eyes to that very passage.  Cool.  Have a great weekend I will be back on Monday morning for dive #6.  Go team Jacob!!  I actually like them both ;)

HBOT dive 3 - trucking along

Today was our third dive.  The funniest thing happened.  When we arrived Doodle ran into the room and climbed in the deflated chamber and said, "I want to Boat please!" 

She has a funny way of getting her thoughts across by using nouns as verbs, ex I want to BED please! (sleepy), I want to TEA please! (thirsty)  It's cute but we hardly notice it anymore.  I am just thrilled when she says anything at all, especially when I can understand it :)

So her being eager made me calm again.  We had one little glitch.  After we were in the chamber and it was fully inflated (takes 5 - 10 min) I realized we didn't have the fan in there with us.  I started to panic because the thought of building heat seemed like a cooking process in which I was the main coarse and that didn't exactly appeal to my Benedryl suppressed panic mode.  So I called her cell and the Dr. came and depressurized us and gave me the fan.  That irritated Pauli so I had to calm her back down and we were off.  She played with my phone the whole time and I read and listened to the ipod.  Certain songs make me feel better and others worse.  It has to be something not to slow (time drags) but not to upbeat because if it makes me want to dance and move around I will get hot and anxious.  I will work on my play list for tomorrow.

Thanks to my friend Katie K.  We now have a DS to play with tomorrow so I think Doodle will love it and if not I will make use of the Harry Potter game she included :)  Yes I love HP - sue me.  My brother totally does not get that.  Then again he still likes comic books and I totally don't get that.  To each his own.

  I have included a couple of pics so you can get an idea of what it feels like inside.  I know this is not supposed to be all about me but until I get a grip on my own discomfort it is, then I will turn my total attention to her.  Conquering your fears is exhausting and empowering at the same time.  Anyone ever done that with something?  I would love to hear about it, really.

HBOT dive #2 . . .a wonderful surprise

Well, I survived dive 2 with the help of Benedryl.  Apparently it does indeed take the edge off.  I also avoided my full caffeine intake this morning as I didn't need any extra help in the heart racing department.  I tried visualizing before I went in and more prayers of course.  The biggest help was bringing my ipod with a few new songs.  I was going to load it with the exact number of minutes of music so I would be able to track time but I had about 40 min on there and that was fine.  I let Doodle borrow it and it kept her occupied a good 15 minutes.  She especially likes Justin Bieber's "Baby" and I do too.  I do not care who knows it.  He is adorable and that makes some people want to hurl but I love it. 

Doodle kept me calm.  It was amazing.  As long as she laid still and played with my phone or a book I felt relaxed but when she started to sing or kick from boredom I started feeling the panic return though much milder than yesterday's experience.  I also found that if I covered my eyes with my arm and couldn't see the ceiling of the chamber, I was okay.  Sitting still helps the heat to not build up to bad. 
Speaking of the word CHAMBER.  What an awful word to use in this situation!!  Its like calling it a Hyperbaric COFFIN or DUNGEON.  Why didn't they name it the Hyperbaric fun tube or the HB Oh boy!  Sheesh, who wants to lock themselves in a CHAMBER that doesn't suck blood?  Me that's who.

I haven't decided if I will post a video daily or intermittently yet.  But here is the really wonderful surprise.  After the dive we had to go straight to her psychologist for ABA therapy (I will fill you in on that soon.)  She did so great today the Dr asked me what we did differently because Doodle was so calm and cooperative.  CALM and COOPERATIVE.  I don't think anyone has ever used those two words together to describe my daughter during one of her many therapy sessions.  That is mini miracle #1  But not the wonderful surprise.  The surprise is . . .

We were sitting in the waiting line at the pharmacy drive thru in the silence no dvd, no radio, no talking and out of the blue she says to me "I love you" 
You have to understand that she hasn't said that to me in 2 or 3 YEARS and never on her own.  It was always echoed.  Boy, what a reward for all I'm going through.  If you have never had a kid who couldn't tell you they love you you probably won't understand how it felt, or maybe you can imagine it.  I don't know but it's like hearing you've won the lottery.  Really.  That's all for today.  Stay tuned and thanks for your many prayers.

A few thoughts on Hbot dive #1

Well, we did it.  We dove.  It.  Was.  Awful for me that is.  She had no problems until it got hot and muggy about half way through.  Then she was bored and hot and started to fidget.  But back to the beginning.  Unbelievably I had quite an experience.  It started out ok.  I am not panicky.  I have never had claustrophobia, I ride roller coasters and am not skittish.  I had a mini freak out when the Dr. zipped it shut.  Its cylindrical in shape and about 7 feet long so we had room to lay down or sit up.  it has to inflate and that takes 5 min and it makes your ears pop like when you drive up in the mtns.  Not uncomfortable though.  I had to turn around and look out the vinyl window to see the Dr and I just thought "I can't do this, I won't be able to get out.!"  Terror welled up inside me as well as panic and guilt because I paid a lot for this (we are skipping our summer vacation at the beach) and I love her and want to be able to bear anything to help her, even my own discomfort.  The shame of losing momentary control was immense.  It was mostly in my head thankfully, I didn't scream but I did insist she unzip the chamber and let me stick my head out and think for a second.  She said it happens sometimes but most always with the parents, the kids are fine.  And that was true.  Doodle thought it was funny.  She happily read books most of the time, or laid in my lap.
 I psyched myself up and told the Dr we would try again.  I laid down and did the only thing I could think of that might help.  I prayed.  I started saying the Rosary.  Now I am Catholic and that may be foreign to some of you but let me tell you - if you have ever been in a moment of intense fear and have nothing to cling to but prayer it helps to have something repetitive or meditative to say because you can't find the words that may be in your heart or head at the moment.  Just get yourself to that place of peace that surpasses human understanding as fast as possible.  I hate to sound dramatic.  I certainly don't live my normal life like this but I want to be honest about this whole process and this is really what happened.  It worked, I asked God and Virgin Mary to calm me and Pauli and to get me through it for her sake.  I was able to have my phone in with me and that helped. I could call my husband, a friend or the Dr in the next room. 

I started reading, time went by.  It felt good and relaxing for a while.  Then it began to be oppressively hot and sticky due to the pressure.  I had a small fan but I directed it at her to keep her cool mostly.  She got bored and agitated.  I started panicking again . . . I thought "She is going to flip out and want to get out, I wonder if she is feeling what I felt at the beginning?"  I had to get out.  I prayed again, harder and slowly the panic subsided. I imagined a clock in my head counting down the time.  Theoretically I knew we were safe and that there would be an end soon.  But what did she think?  Did she think we would never get out again?  I can only imagine what she thought as she has never been able to tell me more than "sad" or "mad" and that has been very very recently.  I hate autism.  I hate it.

So I had an epiphany of sorts.  I always thought people who freak out about enclosed MRI's were kinda wimpy and needed to get over it.  My own mom had to have relaxing medication to get through it.  The Dr. told me to take a Benedryl before coming in tomorrow.  It hit me - my sister Becky, who passed last year, took a Benedryl every day of her life along with other medications like Zanax. She had panic attacks and phobias her whole life.  God I had been so unsympathetic!!  How could I be so harsh on her??  I am so sorry Becky.  I get it now.  I will never judge someone for their phobias again. I get it now.  You have zero control over it and can't talk yourself out of it.  Its a physical and psychological thing.  I get it now.  Wish I had understood then.  I'm sorry . . .

HBOT Session #1

Tomorrow morning Doodle and I will start her first "dive" in the hyperbaric chamber.  I am learning as I go but here is what I know so far:

~It is used on brain damaged victims (such as those in car accidents)
~used on diabetics and others with non healing wounds
~used on divers who acquire the bends
~used on kids with autism who theoretically have areas of the brain not being used due to a possible lack of oxygen perhaps during birth?

~I have heard it can have fantastic results with decreasing behaviors that are undesirable. 
~There is some scientific proof of positive results out there yet it is not approved by the FDA or whatever governmental body regulates such things.
~it is fairly expensive for being experimental, or maybe all experimental treatments are expensive since insurance won't touch them.
`Its probably the only thing we haven't tried to help my daughter.  She is seven now and a well-respected Psychiatrist in the field once told me that when she turned 7 the therapies quit working as well.  Makes me feel panicky and sad but still hopeful.

I believe in miracles, even small ones.  I will still believe in them even if this turns out to be a big waste of money.

I will keep you posted if you are interested.  I plan to take some short videos of me asking her social questions which we have been practicing under ABA therapy every day or two and will post anything interesting that happens.  Feel free to follow our journey.  I am excited and optimistic yet tempered with realism and nagging random voices from science professors in my past!  Prayers are much appreciated as always.